Children are the Luckiest People in the Universe
by TheWrongJedi
Summary: "Her heart contains so many different chords of haunting music. She's a symphony of memories, made of loveliness and light, ugliness and shadow, making the more direct man who loves her sometimes wonder, "Who is she- this intimate and familiar stranger? Who is she... and what is she?" -Linda Goodman. Padme wonders why she had fallen in love with Anakin Skywalker. A Drabble Series.
1. Looking to the Moon

_"He came back, and there was a greedy look in his eyes that should have alarmed her, but did not."_

_- Linda Goodman's Love Signs_

* * *

Padmé didn't count the days that Anakin Skywalker was gone for, she knew that the more the days would pile up, the more lonely she would become.

Of course, Anakin had once mentioned to her that, in the instance she forgot, forgot him, or something on that manner, that all she had to do was look at her Japoré Snippet Charm.

That's what Padmé was doing now, she was sitting in her bedroom, rubbing her thumb over the necklace Anakin had given her so long ago when she didn't look at him but anything else other than a boy.

And after ten years of being separated from him, she had still seen him as that little boy.

It was he who had seen her differently.

And somehow, someway, he had tricked her into seeing him in a new light. He was no longer that little boy whom she called Ani, now, he was Anakin Skywalker. Even though she still called him Ani... It was meant in a loving way.

There were rules, and Padmé had always been the one to follow the rules. The Jedi had rules, and Anakin was breaking the rules by loving her. But, she was encouraging the rule break, in a way, allowing him to love her. She had known little to nothing about Anakin Skywalker, and it surprised her to realize she still knew little to nothing about him. But she had to correct herself, she did not marry a stranger. She had once told Anakin o this a night they had been able to spend together before he had to leave again. The truth had clearly taken him aback, but his wit and charm had made up for her doubt.

_"I've known you since I was a small boy, and you have known me since you were a small girl. We knew each other for those ten years, but we had simply forgotten." _

Padmé had thought about it for some time. They had known each other since they were children, but it still struck a nerve that they knew so little about each other. It shouldn't have bothered her, it didn't bother Anakin after all.

Padmé looked at the snippet, tracing her finger over the curves and engravings Anakin had so carefully made in it for her. He had obviously spent a long time trying to get it just right. Everything Anakin did was done in extreme detail. A good quality, Padmé assumed. But sometimes he worried her.

Not just the constant news in the Senate of the war effort of people talking over how Anakin risked his life yet again, but because of that, a term the Jedi used, _Dark Side, _he had to him.

Her first witness of it after his mother died, and it had finally dawned on Padme just how powerful he really was. Power like that, to kill people, needed restraint. It had scared Padmé how easily he could break like that, to snap in that way. But, he had lost someone, someone who had brought him into this world. And Padmé wondered in that moment if he would do the same for her, and if she would do the same for him.

Love was such a funny thing. Padmé thought with her head, and very well knew everyone needed it. But a love to be kept secret? Padmé had never imagined her life would take such an unexpected turn of events when he came back into her life.

In public, they couldn't even risk being caught looking at each other. And Padmé was forced to tell her mother and sister she hadn't yet married because her duty to serve the people of Naboo in the Senate came first, love second.

Is that what she really believed?

Padmé rubbed her forehead tiredly. Night had fallen, she was tired, and didn't really want to think about this now.

Two months. Padmé realized, despite her telling herself she would not count the days as she got out of bed and walked to her bedroom window, it had been two months since she had seen Anakin, and she realized that, it was the longest he had been gone from her so far since the war started.

Padmé looked up at the moon in the night sky, wondering if Anakin did the same night after night, wondering if she did as well.

The two of them, looking at the moon night after night, wondering if they would ever get to see each other again. It was sad really, Padmé knew day dreaming was bad, but she did it anyway.

Then he appeared in her doorway.

Padmé had to do a double take just to make sure she still wasn't daydreaming.

"Anakin?" She asked, her face breaking out into a smile.

"Padmé..." He whispered, running towards her and spinning her around in his arms.

And in the dark of night, in the penthouse of 500 Republica, Padmé got to know a little bit more about Anakin Skywalker. Spending the whole night, simply... talking. It continued to thrill her that Anakin wasn't one to come home and _demand _to much of her. He did as she wished, and that night she had wished to lay in bed with him and talk. About everything. Politics, the war, she even discovered that Anakin had a padawan now.

Padmé didn't want to fall asleep that night, for many reasons; she didn't want it to end. She enjoyed the conversation she was having with her secret husband, but she mostly didn't want to fall asleep for fear that it would be like any other night that Anakin Skywalker would return; she would wake up, and he be gone.

That's why, when she had finally drifted off into sleep that night, and woken up the next morning, she was surprised to see that he had not left. Padmé smiled at his sleeping face.

If only they could stay like that... forever.

* * *

_"He's so bright and brave, so friendly, open and enthusiastic. She's so utterly feminine, charming, versatile, and spontaneous. If only they don't try to change each other, they can remain boy and girl forever. And children...are the luckiest people in the universe." _

_- Linda Goodman's Love Signs_


	2. Date

_"She longs to be "really, truly in love," but it keeps eluding her. She yearns for motherhood, but often that eludes her too. She finds a different perfection in each man she meets, as she restlessly searches for the one man who has all the qualities she needs for happiness." _

_-Linda Goodman's Sun Signs _

* * *

Naboo was known for it's waterfalls and sparkling waters.

Anakin had never paid much attention to the sights, or the tourist attractions on the neon billboards of Coruscant that talked about them. Only one thing from Naboo had ever really caught his eye...

And that was Padmé Amidala.

Even on the boat ride leading to their destination, all he could look at was her beauty, not the planets. And it was a miracle they were even there together, going on this, "date", as Padmé had referred to it. Anakin still found the puzzled look to wash over his face along with slight embarrassment when Padme had told him of his plan.

It been a long time, Anakin knew, since he saw Padmé, and it would be a long time again after he was forced to leave for the war. An idea had sprung, and Anakin knew it would be difficult to convince Padmé to go along with it, since she was always working in the Senate. Previous attempts of getting her to go away with him had not worked out, and it had surprised him slightly when she had agreed to what she called a "date".

_"Padmé, I'm going to have to leave in two days. Is there anything... special, you want to do?" Anakin asked, not in uncertainty, Anakin never did anything in uncertainty you know._

_"Special as in?" Padmé asked, her tone curious and light._

_"Maybe we could go somewhere where we aren't recognized, and out in public. A place where we are husband and wife." Anakin attempted the previous argument from so long ago, hoping this time it would work on her. _

_"You mean... a date?" Padmé asked playfully. _

_He looked puzzled. "A date?" _

_The playful smile vanished from Padmé's face as Anakin looked to her in confusion. _

_"A date, Anakin. Don't tell me you honestly don't know what a date is?" _

_Anakin hated looking foolish, or stupid, or anything but the great Jedi Knight he was. _

_"Anakin," Padmé smiled, walking over to him and placing her hand on his cheek. "I would love to go on a date with you. We'll go to Naboo... tonight! Get ready! We haven't any time to waste!"_

So, as Padmé had said, this boat ride to the very public and high class restaurant they were going to, was a date.

To ensure that their identity was kept safe though, Padmé had made preparations with the restaurant to have them get the table on the balcony. Even though the plan was to be in the public eye, Padmé had told Anakin that they could never be _too_ careful.

Padmé nuzzled up against Anakin's chest and sighed. Anakin lost his trail of thought as he felt the contact, and smiled down at her. Both of them wore cloaks to conceal their faces until they reached the restaurant, and Anakin didn't have to see her face to know a smile was on her lips.

"I'm glad you suggested this Ani..." She whispered as Anakin wrapped an arm around her.

Even though Padmé was content and happy and at complete and total bliss, Anakin wasn't. It hurt him to know that he was keeping Padmé from living a normal life.

If she didn't love him, if he hadn't told her of his feelings so long ago, she would be going on dates where she didn't have to making reservations for a private setting at restaurants, she wouldn't have to wear a robe with her lover so no one would recognize them, she wouldn't have to share kisses in the dark of Coruscant's alleys or behind closed doors...

"Padmé," He sighed, making her look to him with brown probing eyes. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?" She asked, raising up from his chest and staring into his eyes.

"We're living a life of secrets..." Anakin looked down into the water's reflection at himself disgustedly. "You deserve so much better."

A scowl formed on her face. "Anakin, I won't have you getting depressed and ruining a night we had planned out so carefully." Anakin looked to her with a saddened face, and she realized how guilty he really did feel. Padmé sighed and decided she would use a more gentle tone with her next words.

"One day, Anakin, you and I will be able to live that normal life, and there is nothing better than you. I have all I deserve, and that all I deserve is you. Whether it be after the war is over, or ten years after, of twenty, or fifty. One day, we won't have to be a secret. I love you, Anakin."

Anakin found a smile return to his face.

"How do you do it?" He asked.

"Do what?"

"Be so beautiful and so smart at the same time." Anakin said, diving in and planting a kiss on her lips before she could respond.

Padmé blushed as the kiss ended, and as quickly as the previous scolding of her young husband had come her hearts wings took flight and she kissed him back. Anakin admired how swiftly her mood changed, mostly do to his charm, of course.

The rest of the night had gone as planned, better if not as good. Padmé and Anakin talked about anything and everything, one topic not included. Padmé knew, in time, _when_ the time was right, she could talk to Anakin about it.

_About having a child._

But now was not the time, the war had just begun, and Padmé, despite wanting it to be over as soon as possible, in a large part of having Anakin be home, knew that the war would indeed not be over soon.

So Padmé plastered a fake smile on her face, and as their conversations grew deeper, the smile morphed into one of realness that was true as she and her husband spent the night together.

Anakin had a way of doing that to her.

* * *

_"...beneath his self-confident, aggressive front, lies an inferiority he'd rather die than admit having. The woman who handles his shattered confidence with gentle and total devotion has the best chance of keeping his heart permanently." _

_- Linda Goodmam's Sun Signs_


	3. The Love He Chose Could Die

_Eager eye and willing ear,_

_Lovingly shall nestle near._

_In a Wonderland the lie,_

_Dreaming as the days go by,_

_Dreaming as the summers die:_

_Ever drifting down the stream_

_Lingering in the golden gleam-_

_Life, what is it but a dream?_

- Lewis Carroll

* * *

**Time Period: 22 BBY: Attack of the Clones: Padmé's Lake House Retreat.**

* * *

Padmé turned over in her bed, sleep didn't seem to want to come tonight.

Duty, she had to remind herself, came first. And Ana- her Jedi protector, was being blinded by false feelings. He had been a Jedi for nearly ten years, he didn't what he was _feeling. _He couldn't, he couldn't possibly understand how to cope with them. It was simply that they were alone, and as he had informed her, his first mission without Master Kenobi.

Padmé stretched her arm out, thinking about the rather, _uncomfortable_, situation that Ana- Padmé sighed. That _her Jedi protector _had put them in. He was so young, he couldn't possibly know what love is... And the kiss... Where had he learned to kiss like that?

Padmé shut her eyes. It wasn't wise to think things like that. It was past dark, moonlight was streaming in through the windows of her room. If you listened close enough, you could here the creaking noise of the small insects in the garden.

And... _screaming? _

Padmé sat up in bed, and steadied her breath to make out the noise better. No, no it wasn't screaming. It was, sharp breaths, a moan, someone crying out in whispers.

It was muffled, but Padmé kept hearing the word "Mom" being repeated.

Padmé placed her feet on the ground and slowly made her way over to her door. Opening it slightly, she did not see anyone out in the hall. The nearest bedroom, was, of course, Ana- _HER JEDI PROTECTOR, _and it was only because of the need for safer security, incase there was an incident like there was on Coruscant in her room.

Padmé knew that she should not have to walk around in her own private house as if she were the intruder, but she was slightly nervous. The noise grew closer as she went over to his door, her Jedi Protectors, and she placed her ear to it.

_"Mom... mom, no! Mom-"_

He cut himself off. Padmé knit her eyebrows, wandering what had happened. Then, she heard the shuffling of blankets, and feet approaching the door. Padmé's eyes widened when she realized he was about to walk into the hall, so she ran to her room and threw herself in the covers.

Padmé lay nervously in her sheets for a few seconds, breathing heavily. She was in such a rush to get back into bed she hadn't any time to shut the door. After waiting awhile in anticipation, she slowly relaxed as it appeared he wasn't going to come into her room.

Padmé got up from the bed and went to shut the door. Her hand rested on the doorknob for awhile, and she wondered if she should go confront him; to ask him what had happened. Most likely, he had a nightmare, or something of that manner. It worried her, as much as she didn't want it to, to hear his voice sound so desperate. Padme contemplated stepping out for a long time, but soon decided against it. She would wait until morning, and see if by then he were any better.

Anakin took in a deep breath as the sun started to rise. Hands behind his back, posture perfect, he appeared as if nothing were wrong. That's what a Jedi was supposed to do, after all.

"Don't leave." He said, keeping his eyes shut as he felt her shock being broadcasted out towards him. She had probably thought he didn't sense her very soothing presence.

"I don't want to disturb you."

"Your presence is soothing."

"You were having a nightmare..."

Anakin took in another breath. "Jedi don't have nightmares."

"I heard you."

_"I know..." _He thought, remembering the same soothing presence at his door that had shot him out of his dream.

He turned to her. "It was about my mother... She- She's in pain Padmé. I know I'm disobeying my orders to protect you but... I have to go to her, make sure she's safe."

Padmé didn't so much as blink an eyelash. "I understand."

"I'm sorry Padmé, but I have to go."

* * *

**Time Period: 19 BBY: Revenge of the Sith: 500 Republica: Padmé's Apartment Complex.**

* * *

Something shifted in the bed. Padmé had just assumed it was Anakin turning over at first, but then, she felt nothing beside her, cold crept along her back as the warm body that had been next to her suddenly vanished.

Padmé turned her head over, Anakin, he was... walking out of her- their room.

It didn't take long for her to get out of bed as well and make her way to him. He was on the Veranda, sitting on the edge of the couch.

Resting her hand on his shoulder, she asked. "What's wrong?"

He looked over at her. "Nothing," He smiled, and his hand grabbed hold of the Snippet she was wearing around her neck.

"I remember when I gave you this..."

Padmé wasn't fooled. "How long is it going to take for us to be honest with each other?"

Anakin dropped the Snippet charm and walked away from her, looking out into the ever busy streets of Coruscant from the veranda.

"It was a dream."

"About?"

"Like the ones I use to have about my mother, before she died..." He inwardly groaned.

"And?" Padmé urged.

"And it was about you."

"Bad?"

Anakin looked deep into Padmé's eyes.

"You die in childbirth."

Padmé was clearly taken aback. Resting a hand on her stomach, she asked. "And the baby?"

He looked to her stomach. "I don't know..."

Padmé attempted to approach him. "Anakin, it was only a dream-"

He turned to face her quickly. "I won't let these ones become real. I-I won't lose you the way I lost my mother."

Padmé sighed. "Anakin," She said, holding him close. "This baby will change our lives. I doubt the Queen will allow me to continue to serve... And if the Council finds out you're the father-"

"I know, I know..." Anakin said, looking away.

"Do you think, maybe, Obi-Wan could help us?"

"We don't need his help!" Anakin practically snapped. "This baby is a blessing..."

Padmé rested her head against his chest, not knowing exactly what else to do other than be with him. He had once, after all, told her that her presence was soothing.

* * *

_"He's both an idealist and an egotist, which means he hates to admit he's wrong, or that the love he chose could die."_

_- Linda Goodman's Sun Signs_

* * *

**Sorry if the movie dialogue is not really correct, I have watched the movies thousands of times but it still seems to escape me what they say when I want to remember. This was mainly just movie stuff, and I won't be doing that often, but I wanted to get in that phrase form Linda Goodman somehow... **


	4. Everything Dies and Descends Eventually

Suddenly life wasn't all about him anymore.

_Not that it ever had been... _

A Jedi was supposed to be selfless, placing the needs of others before their own.

_And that's what he had constantly told himself he was doing, it's what he left himself believe... _

Before the war, before there was Padmé, Anakin had not realized why it was forbidden for a Jedi to have attachments.

_Now he pays the ultimate price... _

__She was the only thing left in his life he cared about, and... she didn't want any of it. The warning had been so clear... Yet, she acted as if it didn't worry her a bit. How could she be so calm, when he was so worried? It was if she didn't even care or value her life. And he was the only one who still didn't sleep at night because of all the events that had taken place.

_Everything dies and descends eventually... _

The memory's of her were bitter sweet. The memory's that were very few because the war separated them. The memories of everything hurt. Shmi, still his mother. Qui-Gon, still his hero. Obi-Wan, his brother, his best friend... He left him for dead. Ahsoka... he failed her too.

And Padmé... he _loved _her. And that wasn't hard for him to admit. Padmé was everything. She was all he ever wanted and everything he didn't need all at once. She gave him a feeling he didn't think he could ever feel. It was more than love for her, it was the fact that she could get any man she wanted. She could have lived a life without secrets and lies and forgotten him completely after the Battle of Geonosis.

_But she stayed... _

And in the end, she gave it all up. The love they had for each other for democracy. He did it all for _her... _

But everything dies and descends eventually.

_Even love..._


	5. Empty Promises

__"What if I don't come back this time?"

Padmé felt sick as these words spewed from her husband mouth. She couldn't imagine life without him. It wasn't like it was a thought that hadn't crossed her mind though, he was gone for such great lengths of time that she oftened wondered if everything about him was just a dream. But when he touched her, or she touched him and the warm feeling that flew through her fingers occurred- she knew it was real.

Even if it _was _a secret.

"Ani," Padmé had the most frightened expression on her face and Anakin couldn't help but feel regretful. "Don't say things like that to me."

"But if I don't..." He paused and his eyes turned sad. He stroked her face for a moment before pulling her into her arms. "Would you- would you..."

He didn't finish his sentence, and he didn't have to. Padmé understood what he meant and what he was trying to ask. He feared that she would fall in love with someone else and forget him- one of his biggest fears. And ever since the incident with Clovis it had only added to his jealousy. Padmé couldn't imagine ever being happy again without Anakin. If he- if he _died, _Padmé would die with him. The only thing other than him that really kept her going was the war, and mostly because the sooner it ended the sooner her Ani would be home.

"Never." She promised, snuggling into his chest. "I would never be happy without you... Please don't leave me. Ever."

"I promise." He ran a hand through her brown curls and bit back tears as he kissed her forehead. "I will never leave you."

"But your leaving tonight..." She muttered, making him smile weakly.

"But I'll always come back... That's my promise."

* * *

He dreams of her death, and when he shoots up out of bed he finds her still sleeping. He wants to touch her, feel her soft skin against his fingers but he doesn't. He instead gets up out of bed and leaves her to rest.

Never before had he thought it would be _her _leaving him. Anakin always thought that she would die in old age like a person should. Her body was perfectly healthy, dying in childbirth didn't make sense and he couldn't imagine the thought of someone else leaving him. Padmé was all he had left in this big galaxy that kept him going. Everyone else had either died or left him to be on his own.

He promised her he wouldn't leave her... now she had to promise him the same.


	6. Padmé's Destiny

**Padmé's Destiny POV**

* * *

I never thought I would die this way.

But I know I'm going.

It's too late now. My chest feels heavy, I can't feel anything below my waist- this is the end.

I think about Luke, and Leia. I hadn't known I would have twins. I wonder what will happen to them. I wonder if they'll even know who I am. And it breaks my heart even more. Will they ever know who their father is? I'm leaving them alone in this big galaxy and the Empire, and they're just children...

And then my heart rate plummets.

And suddenly every worry leaves my body.

My last thought drifts to Anakin...

Anakin...

"Obi-Wan," I manage to croak out, though it's incredibly hard. My neck is so soar, and oxygen is escaping with every word. "There is still," My eyes are shut, but I know he is listening. Obi-Wan may not believe me, but I know he will listen. "Good in him, I know." If he truly believes in Ani, he'll know, and I'm not sure what he did to my husband but I can feel it in my heart- he is still alive. And I _know _that whatever happened to him... It _wasn't _truly him. I still love him, and I think that is ultimately why I suddenly can't feel my heart beat anymore. I'm dead inside. "I know there is, still..."

This is when it happens. I feel my lungs tighten and my head drifting to one side and the faint scream of a child and I barely am conscious. I have to strain and exert all of my physical energy to try to one last time claim feeling and smelling and hearing as my own.

Its not until a complete abyss and blackness though do I hear it.

_"Noooooooooooooooooooooo!"_


End file.
